Why does it still come to a surprise to me when I realise how unemotionally responsive (emotionally unresponsive?) I can be.
It’s not that I don’t feel feelings, I definitely do. I can pinpoint my feelings most of the time, given enough time to ruminate and sit with it.
I probably don’t show it as much, so people don’t see it. (Actually I wouldn’t know. It’s also why I wish I could view myself as a third person. What do I actually show? What do people see?)
Or perhaps my form of expression isn’t as ‘direct’ as someone else who may wear his heart on his sleeve. Or perhaps my actions don’t directly come off as how I feel, because I don’t act solely based on my emotions. (For example, I fall down and I’m bleeding, instead of displaying my pain, I put a plaster over my wound.)
I’m not lying. I’m not hiding intentionally. If you want to find out how I really feel… ask me. I’ll tell you.
